08.26.2013

My brain–

yes, it is damaged.

I think I would be better off somewhere (like a mental institution) I cannot hurt someone or hurt myself emotionally.

Not insane–

no, I’m just misunderstood.

I think because I was fine in the beginning, it is believed that I now PURPOSELY hurt people.

I love–

yes, that is why I react violently.

I think that I say things I do not mean because  I use my words as a my weapon – I always feel as if I am not being heard.

I have pushed her away, AGAIN–

no, I have not done it consciously.

I think she believes that it is now my easy excuse, she refuses to accept that I am not who I was.

I have pushed him away, for the first (and last) time.

yes, he thought I was innocent.

I think he thought was ready for more with me.

Why will no one accept that I am brain damaged? My emotions are not controllable by just me. I need other people to realize that the actions/reactions I have are able to be dealt with—it just takes patience; then they are seemingly controlled, because of the way I am “handled.”

I AM worth it…I am hurting and angry words/actions happen when I am in pain.

Maybe I should beg him to take me back…and be unhappy where “r’s” are pretty much nonexistent; instead of keeping her so pissed because I’m here and give the REAL man relief.

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