(a letter for my big brother, Jerry)

Jerry, I’m so sorry. Im sorry I thought you would grow out of your frustration. Im sorry I thought you would learn better coping skills. Im sorry that I was frightened and unsure of how to react when you were in that home. Im sorry I ever let our bond be “forgotten” by distance, time,Continue reading “(a letter for my big brother, Jerry)”

p 35 my ritual for Jerry We will be outside, sun shining, standing close. Very few people will attend, only b/c you feel self conscious, not b/c you are not loved. We connected b/c we understood one another. We needed each other. We would laugh @ breakfast, giggle @ bedtime. Watch “Robin Hood: Men InContinue reading

I could have missed the PAIN, But I’d have (had to) miss the dance 07.23.02 –But grief is about living. –Grief involves letting go of someone who has died, but it’s also about holding on and recognizing life, especially your own. (page 9) death is… sunny skies interrupted by clouds of darkness, harsh rain, clearingContinue reading

…no date…(but it was in the 00’s)

I expect too much, my expectations are high. my standards are too high. I won’t try to work for something. I just expet (sic) things to happen. I trust no one, yet I betray others trust in me. I immediately assume all decisions are b/c of me. I jump to conclusions. I over analyze everyContinue reading “…no date…(but it was in the 00’s)”